Working with Death can sometimes be a bitter pill. In the last couple months, several friends have lost companions, friends, and family members. Not even I am immune to it. Less then a month ago I had to put my dog down.
There she is in all her glory. Next year she would have been twenty. I know she had a good life, after all, that is an incredibly long time for a dog to live. I also knew that, whether I wanted to or not, I had to be there when she passed. So I pushed it off as long as I could, until the day finally came where the light in her eyes changed. She was such a fighter that she never let that spark go away. She refused to admit that she was in pain, that she couldn’t bark anymore, or that she was just tired. This is where being linked to Death becomes so very bittersweet, because I looked into her face one morning and I watched the change happen. That spark slowly slipped away from her. She sighed so heavily. I knew she was ready, and she was telling me that it was time for me to do my job.
Less then three days later we were at the vet. We were surrounded by friends and family. Even Hela was there. Because this was a most important soul to take back to Helheim and watch over. My sweet dog had been pampered and given days worth of her favorite foods. And now she was happy to move on. I still wasn’t ready, but it wasn’t my choice to make anymore. I held her in my arms as the vet did their job, and felt the life just disappear. I could feel her almost thanking me and then she was gone. Her and Hela, heading home to wait for me.
It was the hardest thing I have ever done. I still have one dog and this experience won’t stop me from having more dogs. But I digress. In the end, this is just a reminder. When you work with the Gods, it isn’t all rainbows and unicorns, it isn’t always happy fun time. Sometimes you have to do the shit work. Those are the times that make you stronger, that make you the person you need to be.
To put it simply; suck it up and do what you are supposed to do.